WOOSH!

I'm bored. Nobody's online and I'm still debating whether I should eat or not, so that means I have time to blog about something.

What sucks is, I don't know what. Well maybe I do.

I'm excited for lent. I have no idea why. Just giving stuff up and watching everybody else struggle with their promises is pretty fun. And you get to experience things. Like a pile of honey walnut shrimp WITHOUT rice. Hahahaha. That was such a bad experience. But it had to be done.

I'm not very excited for Christmas, though. You know when you pass that age of recieving gifts, and then transist into the age of giving gifts? Yeah, that's where I am. Supah lame. I mean, celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ is great. Unfortunately for my family, Christmas is not a religious time in the least bit. It IS family time, don't get me wrong, but it has nothing to do with religion. I'll just keep my faith strong for them, even if they aren't focused on the real "bigger picture."

What else is on my brain? Oh right, black friday. Oh my freakin lord it's gonna suck so badly on black friday. Usually it's a fun time, but that's only if you don't work in a retail store. I'm gonna have to clean. The whole freakin time. And there's no excuses either. I have to clean and make it freakin PERFECT, or else my day will be done. I think I can manage though, if I just concentrate on cleaning, forget about the customers and let my co-workers handle all the other aspects of my job, I should be fine. That's why we're a TEAM. I'm gonna eat so much on Thanksgiving. Just to make my time at work on black friday more pleasant. I can think about the meal I had the day before, and it'll all be ok. Hopefully. Ugh.

What else is there?

I dunno. I'm getting kinda hungry now so I guess I'll end this thing with a pop and a bang.

And a fizzle into oblivion.

Kay bye.

Gives You Hell / Buddy

I never expected to be stricken so easily. Especially after that last debacle. It's like I feel fresh. In slanguage and proper English. I thought the last one was the last one and that was that, and I'd just have to live with it, but apparently not. I guess the truth of what I've been seeking is that the heart is both vulnerable and fickle. One day it might look east, to the sunrise, but the sunset in the west is just as beautiful. Unfortunately for me, beauty is always the basis of my downfall. I won't accomplish anything lingering on the past and the mistakes I've so naively fell into. It's over and done with. What's lost is lost, but what could be gained is so prospective.

This post was short, but it's good enough for me.

Dashboard Confessional
"Truth be told, I miss you.
Truth be told, I'm lying."

Musiq Soulchild
"Girl it would be fly,
If you were my B-U-D-D-Y."

Those lyrics mostly sum up how I am. Hah. Alright suckas, peace out.

Did you choose right?

I remember asking you if you wanted to really be my friend and you said yes. You said it mattered to you, and that you cared. What sucks is that you don't understand what a friend is. I don't really feel like making stupid metaphors right now, so I'll just get right to the point.

All you care about is the stuff I do for you. I offer to take you to the mall and spend money on you, and you're hella down to go, but then I ask if you just want to chill, and you don't feel like it.

So basically all this "friendship" really is, is a way for you to get me to do stuff for you. And buy you things. And let you use me, because you know that I won't just leave you alone. Because I'm a REAL friend. And all you are is a leech. And I wanted to spend the one night I had a car with you. I was about to turn my back on some of my REAL friends to hang out with you.

Did you choose right when you said you wanted to be my friend? Were you telling the truth when you said that you cared? Probably not. But I'll make the right choice. I'd rather save my money for people who actually care about ME. My real friends who ride or die. I'm tired of your fakeness, and your false appreciation. Especially when no one else would do what I would for you.

It's ok, though. It's my fault for letting you. I'm just saying it's over now. If you really want to be my friend, then you can try to prove it to me. Until then, I'm done spending 10 dollars a week on you.

And you're probably gonna say something like how I'm butthurt or whatever. But really, if you were my friend, you would have said yes, and not assumed I was trying to ask you out. I hope that sushi I brought you tasted good. Hahaha.

Also, if you were busy or something, you could have said so. So don't blame me if I'm pissed off that you only want to hang with me when I'm buying you something.

[titlehere]

I don't know what this is going to be about, but I just had the sudden impulse to write something after listening to The Beatles for like half an hour. I should start with something a little earlier, though.

I was watching videos on the youtubes. It started with Gabe Bondoc at FAP, playing his cover medley. Then moved on to The Adrian William Project - On My Way Down. Afterwards, I went to Jason Mraz - Beautiful Mess, followed by You and I Both. Then it went to Alyssa Bernal covering Hallelujah (the one from Shrek). I thought about searching up Casting Crowns and Smash Mouth, but I got distracted by Kate Voegele's cover of Hallelujah, followed by a bunch of random international "Idol" singers. Then I got into The Beatles. And this is where I start.

I wonder what it must have felt like writing their music. They're not really my style, I don't like them all that much, but people who have covered their songs and made it different than the original bring out the actual potential of the songs. Like Come Together. Oh my freakin jeeze. I think the only Beatles song that I like in its original format is "All you Need is Love" and that's about it. Just because they ran the whole orchestra thing in an awesome way. Enough of that, though, I think I just found out what this post is gonna be about.

I don't know what kind of music I like anymore. I don't know, I've been confused lately. There's so much good stuff. My favorite song right now really isn't even my usual style. It's Maybach Music with T-Pain, Kanye West, Rick Ross, and Lil Wayne. I don't even like Lil Wayne. And I've never been too partial to that kind of rap. Like, I look at Jason Mraz and John Mayer, and they're great, I love acoustic, but I'm just not feeling it too much. Then there's electrocoustic. Owl City, Nevershoutnever! and whatnot. I haven't listened to straight up emo music in a while. I might try that out again, but I'm not feeling very hyped. Just dull, and sad, rather than angry. And I think slow jams or acoustic music is better when you're sad. Hardcore screamo is much better when you're angry.

I don't know what I want anymore. It's hard to choose one or the other, but it is obvious which one treats you better. But even so, sometimes you just really want the other one. Music makes my brain fickle. Ah, whatever, I'll just keep listening. Something's bound to catch my attention.